Where did it go?

Where did that anxiety go?

There is a new heart in our heart.

There was an exchange.

Like something dunked. 
Like all we could do was dunk.  

Like there had been a dead trunk.

There had been dryness. 
And gaps.

We went without. A simple thing
To deprive ourselves from food for a day. 
Done with trying
felt like we were prying with
now release or entry.
Dizzy from dead ends,
searching for some alleyway.
it was like making up the could-bes ....
but weren't were not getting us closer to our entries.
 

My heart was cold Lord.  My heart was not my heart. 
But then this lift. This lake like feeling.

 All the ways my life seem to patter.  All the strife that cut and battered.  Those little lies that batter.  That disconnect that shatters.  

But now I have this heart return.  Now you brought me into wide places.  now I have your darling dear.  Now I come like

Now I am not clutching. Now my team aplauds. How curious when we stepped down. When we stopped maintinging and got on our knees.  How heavy and what if it doesn't need to be.

I keep asking, keep waiting for that cringe.  But here I am cruising since Conference, I came home from work each day without that drop. Without that nasty exchange.  That familiar frantic, the part of me that falls away.

Don't miss that miracle.  It's subtle when you shift our world.  Suddenly we can see clearly.